Thursday, August 30, 2012

A Blurred Vision

It’s 04:00 A.M. in India. The dogs that howled and sent a chill down my spine seemed to have retired for the night. Beautiful dreams should be entertaining my family that’s enjoying their slumber and needless to mention about my pet dog which is deemed to dream about bananas all the time. Yeah, that’s what the scientists have ascertained about Ladradors’ dream pattern J

So what am I doing in these devil hours? There is this one point in life when you don’t dream when you sleep, but you get to battle against the dreams which don’t let you catch forty winks. The latter is exactly what is happening in my range. A desire that was cultivated in me unknowingly, that grew along with me effortlessly and now when almost entire city is busy snoring, this urge of mine is stymieing my eyelids from kissing and has made me purge out my thoughts.

Just like every other Indian kid, several opportunities circled me to exhibit my writing skills during my school days. What a pleasure was it to create original content for the essay writing competitions! Internet was still a ghost that wasn’t woken up from the grave then. Preparing for writing competitions was considered as a Himalyan task, for the research that the students had to do patiently. Unlike other kids, the end-result didn’t have a great influence on me. The pleasure of writing simply made me participate in the competitions. (Sorry about the little bragging there ;)

Dormant period ensued schooling. I was hibernating from reading and writing perspectives and that’s when I was hit by a thunderbolt. I reckon that it was predestined; perhaps that’s what is called as Karmic twists and turns of life. A beautiful BlogSpot of my cousin, which I visited, rekindled the fire in me. My alterego that was so addicted to the pleasure of writing responded to that wake-up call by creating a writing corner for myself and posting few stories and articles, like a toddler that goes around the house, crayoning in the wall proudly. It wouldn’t hurt much to own up that so is the case still.

It wasn’t easy for a beginner to continue writing by gathering courage to thwart destructive criticism. Little did I know then, that I wasn’t destined to quit writing, when I halted responding to a sabotaging feedback.  When the rough waves receded, just like an ostrich that pops out its head, I slowly started to scribble again. Bitter experiences are imperative for one to ponder and introspect. Those days have made me a resolute believer of the saying that, “Problems and failures are like washing machines. They squeeze you, rinse you and swirl you. But you would come out clean and fresh after the rough run.”

After few years of making modest efforts to read and write constantly and having become a potpourri of all the authors that I have read, I’m now contemplating on taking giant leap in my career. Possessing a heart that’s so full of writing and a brain that’s longing to learn more about writing, I reckon that it’s ideal to pick up writing for the next level and choose a profession that would support to sate the urge. ‘Blessed’ is the word to describe how elated should I be to be a part of the family that backs me up and inspires me to go further. Mulling over the thought of adopting the role of a writer, I’m intimidated by the thoughts of finding a purpose of the career that I’ve had so far and overwhelmed by pessimistic thoughts on seeing victory over the radical decision that I’ve chosen. Having said and done, without taking a look back, I’m geared to march towards the horizon that looks bright and peaceful and I’ve chosen to put my rationale to rest. Ruskin Bond is to be blamed for the volte-face that I’m going through. Bond said that, “It was possible to make money out of one’s hobby was something I was to remember when writing became my passion.”   J

I firmly believe that I’m not about to get carried away with that beautiful quote but I’m certainly deep-rooted about the principle that one should do what they like doing. If writing is what that would make me feel complete, let the blurred vision that I have now become clear and focused. Inspire me!

5 comments:

  1. As usual, rocking!!!! Keep it coming!!!

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  2. Thanks Mohan for your useful post. It makes me feel better blurred vision

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  3. Thank you for reading, Hugo. I'm glad that my post made you feel good :)

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